Ch-15 Atomic Models
NS 100
. . .by studying spectral patterns and by conducting experiments, they were able to develop models of the atom.
                        Are we 'seeing' what we think we are 'seeing', or
are we 'seeing' what is really there?
Atom in a Box  
              Electromagnetic Spectrum            
      SPECTRAL LINES      


                      The Quantum World  
                                            Probability Clouds          
          Determinism takes a back seat.                      
    Where is that darn electron, anyway?    

The National Research Council (NRC) has recently announced the discovery
of the heaviest chemical element yet known to science.

The new element has been tentatively named Governmentium.

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause some morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as Critical Morass.

      It's not the nucleus that counts. . .
it's the last few electrons that make all the difference.